2026-01-18
Unconditional love feels better but makes you powerless
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Main
- If someone offers peace, or money, or love, with terms and conditions attached, it means they're probably using you to project their own power over the world.
- If someone offers you peace or money or love with no terms and conditions attached, it means they actually care about you.
- But also it's a signal that maybe they have no actual power in the first place? In particular, if they are offering peace, money and love to everyone unconditionally, it's basically a guarantee in my head that they have no actual power.
- Whenever I offer someone peace or money or love, I too want to offer it with as few terms and conditions as possible.
- In practice I've realised I often can't offer it unconditionally. I'm too power-hungry for that.
- So I resort to the second best thing, which is to minimise the amount of terms and conditions.
- Lots of people have written lots of things about why you should be non-violent unconditionally, or love people unconditionally, or donate money unconditionally.
- This will make you happy but is also a recipe for ensuring you never have any actual power?
- You will be persuasive but your persuasion won't be backed by anything stronger. People can just ignore you, and they often will.
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