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2026-05-29

Worshipping a different God

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There are small a atheists and capital A Atheists. I am the latter. I worship safe technological progress and am willing to devote my life to it. I don't just find it "cool."
Trying to marry a small a atheist is just as difficult for me as a christian pastor who is a True Believer, trying to marry a more normie christian who just inherited these values but doesn't truly believe. (You can just as easily analogise this to hinduism or islam)
I wish to spend the rest of my days worshipping in the temple of my God. I have no reason to engage in random hobbies and random conversations and what not. Death is coming. The end is near. There is still time for forgiveness. Repent and ye shall be forgiven. Repent not and watch as the gates of Hades descend upon this Earth. Judgment shall be swift but excrutiatingly painful.

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Holy fuck I can't help but wonder to what extent did Yudkowsky literally model his ideology after the Judaism in which he was raised.
Also relevant to the fact that Yudkowsky has a 100% p(doom) and my p(doom) is noticeably lower. Mine is still pretty high but not as high as his.

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To be clear, I do still think it is possible for me to marry a small a atheist. This doesn't seem impossible to me, it takes extra work. For that matter I even think it is possible for marry a traditional religious person. Also doesn't seem impossible to me, it takes extra work.
I just have to recognise that making an interfaith marriage like this work, and then also not fighting over which faith to raise your children in, all this is very hard territory. There are people who have succeeded at it in the past, but this is playing life on Hard Mode.

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